Relationship Advice 1003: How's your relationship?

I have been thinking to write on this topic for so long now. But my ideas before doesn't seem logical enough, until I have experienced it.

Now, I want to write on this topic based on my own experiences, observations, continuous reading and research on my own.

When I was young (yeah, I'm older now and loving it), I have this belief that compatibility is not an issue to have a harmonious relationship. I was lure into thinking that love is all that matters, those butterflies in your chest every time you are with your partner, sweaty palms when he smiles at you, as exactly seen and portrayed in the movies. How hypothetically movies are created sometimes! Though, it felt really good to experience all that, because not everyone has gone through that during their teenage life.

When you're young, you are carefree, fun-loving, free-spirited and your way of thinking about relationships is still too shallow. It's like, if it's meant to be, then it's going to be just fine and end up happily ever after. I was wrong.

Now that I'm older, my views about relationship has dramatically changed. I admit, I have failed in the past, but it had taught me lessons in my life that made me more wiser, if not better. It had taught me to be more kinder, to take everything slowly, no rush. After all, it's your happiness that's at stake.

So let me share these to you. First, a relationship will work if both are willing to work on it.  Communication is the key. Those annoying habits that your partner has. Instead of acting on it negatively, take it on a positive way. You think, this is a hard thing to do? No, it's not really. Learn to communicate it with your partner in a more loving way.


Second, attitude! Got one? No one can change us. That's a fact. They can only motivate us, inspire us. And it's up to you if you want to change yourself. Finding the right partner, without the right attitude is not easy. It can be stressful. So, who you truly are will show up if you are not compatible with your partner. Kindness is one of the key.


Third, stop reading and believing in those horoscopes and paying your fortune tellers to tell you who you are most compatible with. Before I was a fan of this Horoscope comics and websites that sometimes, my time is consumed in researching instead of getting to know my partner more. Compatibility is a big issue in a relationship, but is not measured by the astrological stars you are born with. Those are simply guidelines for general patronage. Not for individual. Also, stop believing that you just have not met your one true love yet. Maybe you did, but you have ushered him/her away because of this damn horoscopes! (Imagine,  6 billion people?) Still want to follow it? Up to you, but I won't. Unless, you want to end up not experiencing what "Love" truly is.  Come on, take a risk in love and get to know yourself in your own way and through your partner. It's still the best way to experience love and life itself! Taking risk is the key.

Lastly, to maintain a harmonious and loving relationship, respect and trust each other. Continue and never get tired doing small/big things, little surprises, saying those magic words "i love u" and believing on it, continue fighting for it, when you know in your heart, if it's worth it.

So, these are what experiences have taught me, and everyday is a continuous process of learning about love, about life, about my partner, and about myself.